Because I’m more than a little claustrophobic, the other day I wondered what would happen if I got stuck in the bathroom while Peter was in Florida. The new doorknob he put on (not that I’m saying he’s not handy at home repairs) sucks. And sticks. And if I couldn’t get it to turn while he was away, what would I do? What if no one heard when I yelled out the tiny second floor window into our woodsy backyard (trees absorb sound don’t they?). Plenty of water, that’s a good thing. No food. Bad. There are books in the bathroom—there are books in every room—but my reading glasses live in a coffee mug on my desk. Note: get a set of magnifiers for bathroom. What about the cats? How long would they survive without Herring and Sardine Supreme… Turkey Delight… fresh crunchies?

Oh god. This is terrible.

Note: outfit bathroom with screwdriver, bag of chips, phone; teach cats how to work snap-off lids.

By the way—just curious—if no one’s home, why am I closing the bathroom door??


4 thoughts on “survivorwoman

  1. If your cats are anything like mine, I know exactly why you’re closing the door. With a miaow like an air raid siren and a stare that would freeze a politician, mid-justification speech, this is one larger-than-life character I enjoy a short break from.

    Better stock the bathroom….

  2. Hope you don’t get yourself locked in! When I was in Ukraine, my sister’s friend got herself stuck in the TINY bathroom. Fortunately, being a Ukrainian and prepared for all eventualities, the landlady had a pair of pliers in the bathroom cupboard. All was well.

    1. I love it. Your Ukrainian landlady sounds like the original Survivorwoman. Why isn’t everyone this brilliant? (Now if only I can find our pliers…)

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